Electric Picnic-A basic guide to surviving E.P, when not at E.P
“Hazel, Conor and 62 other friends are attending an event near you today”…thanks for the reminder Facebook, AS IF I didn’t know!! It’s here guys, and those of you like me who are not making their way to Stradbally clad with wellies, drink and excitement to beat the band have to weather this storm together. So here’s what to do:
#1 Avoid Snapchat at all costs. I guarantee you already have 1–2 friends with a story about the journey to Stradbally, their breakfast for lining their stomach, wellie nightmare, hair mare, tent life, car banter, first pick of campsite sh!*e etc etc etc. We just don’t need that this weekend! You either avoid or start watching asap as by Sunday night you'll have ten thousand stories/78 snaps to view and your phone won’t be the only thing breaking down!
#2 Avoid Facebook too. It won't be as bad as the above for the weekend, but you will still get approximately 55 of the 62 friends who are going checking in at several different occasions, leading to more sighing and jealousy and rage. Be warned though, Facebook may be annoying now but just wait until Tuesday/Wednesday when the photos start popping up. Some may even creep in on Monday as those still buzzing on life want to share their happiest moments. Basically just be careful, it’s a minefield out there!
#3 This is an annoying one. Don’t turn on the radio. Every decent radio station will either be talking about it, broadcasting live from it, or playing Electric Picnic bands just for the fun of it. It’s starting to get tricky now, but at least we have music on our phones right?
#4 Grab that friend who is home for the weekend and don't let go. Weathering this together will be much easier as you'll sit and bitch about how basic they are all being while both secretly being jealous. Remaining in someone's company is better than being hidden under a duvet crying. #winwin
#5 Be happy for your friends. (FAR EASIER SAID THAN DONE) but not so happy to receive drunk calls anytime day or night. So either put your phone on silent or be cautious when answering in the company of your parents/on your break at work/sitting in that cafe. God knows what's on the other end of that call!
#6 Don't be disappointed this weekend if everywhere is quiet. If Facebook is anything to go by EVERYONE is at the picnic so expect tumbleweed in every other city in Ireland.
#7 Have a restful weekend. You're going to need a lot of mental energy next week when every friend fills you in on the antics. Start preparing yourself now. Spend a few minutes in front of the mirror everyday smiling and doing your best pretend interested face. Nodding is good and a few ‘no way’s’ thrown in usually seem pretty believable.
So there you have it, my simple guide to avoid jealousy this weekend. Who says a hermit lifestyle can't be fun? Best of luck ;)